Where Does Happiness Come From?

In Tanzania, the power often goes out during a rainstorm. On a recent occasion, a group of small children applauded instead of complaining about the darkness. When an adult asked them why they were so happy to be in the dark, they replied, “Now we can sit around a candle and talk about our days.” Later, the children decided to also seize the moment to dance and sing. 

Even at such a young age, these children have already grasped that happiness comes from recognizing each moment—even the inconvenient or challenging ones—as an opportunity to find joy and learn. 

Happiness comes from the moments when we are able to find joy in the little gifts that life places in front of us. It is about changing our perspective. It is about practicing gratitude for the teachable experiences that provide a valuable lesson for us to take forward in a positive way. 

Instead of lamenting about how difficult life can be at times, we choose to identify the blessings and then readjust our mindset by asking ourselves, “What do I need to do differently in this moment to feel gratitude instead of resentment?” 

Life is challenging, unpredictable, and full of change. Happiness can sometimes be elusive. Even so, it is important to remember that we have more control over how we react and feel about our experiences than we think. 

Change your perspective and invite happiness in to celebrate every teachable moment with you. 

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com. 

How to Stay Humble in an Imperfect World

During a recent television interview profiling the CEO of a global property restoration company, he not only talked about the success of the business he built from the ground up, but also about the one task he is devoted to completing daily.

Every morning, the CEO signs birthday cards for employees celebrating that day and, when possible, includes a personal note. He initially started the process when his team was comprised of just nineteen employees. Today, thousands work for him around the world. When asked why he takes the time to focus on this task when there are many other important issues for him to address each day, he stated that it is important to him to stay humble. It is very possible that this CEO has a loyal team behind him because his actions show that he genuinely cares about those who support him, not just himself and his accomplishments.

So, what does being humble mean exactly?

Having humility in your life and work means that you believe, no matter your title, bank account balance, or material possessions, that you are not better than those around you.

Being humble means:

• You understand the difference between confidence and arrogance.

• You set clear core values for yourself, base your daily actions on those values, and no matter the temptation to stray from those values, you stay true to your mission of being a positive influence on those around you.

• You take time to mentor others by first pointing out their unique talents and strengths, and then guiding them to find their passion and place in the world.

• You never forget those who have helped you along the way by checking in with them on a regular basis to determine if there is a way you can help them achieve greatness.

• You greet those who cross your path with genuine curiosity about how they really are, no matter their title, role, or wealth status.

• You have a willingness to always learn, and never believe you know it all about anything.

While navigating our way through an often competitive world and workplace, it can be tempting to boast about our achievements or focus only on ourselves as a way to stand out. But is that truly the best way to live?

Being humble is not a weakness. Instead, it is a strength that can serve as a trusted guide with a purpose of gently reminding you that life is more than material objects and professional accomplishments. Leading with humility is about being kind, focusing out instead of in, sharing recognition, and practicing gratitude for all the gifts life brings you every day.

“Being humble means recognizing that we are not on earth to see how important we can become but to see how much difference we can make in the lives of others.”

--Gordon B. Hinckley

 Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Mindfulness Practice – Slowing Down to Enjoy Life’s Simple Gifts

One of life’s simple gifts captured by Vicky DeCoster while on a recent hike in the woods

In a world where chaos and busyness is often embraced and even celebrated, it can be difficult to jump off the hamster wheel of life and take a breath. Yet as difficult as it can be to execute at times, the practice of slowing down to enjoy the simple gifts that life brings on a daily basis is critical to maintaining our mental health, especially during challenging periods.

When was the last time you set an intention to really notice the world around you?

Welcome this opportunity to close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Imagine yourself walking on a path in a forest. As you listen to the leaves crunching under your feet and the wind gently rustling the leaves of the trees, you decide not to just look at the path in front of you like you always do. Instead, you choose to begin observing the world through the wonderment of someone who has never seen it before.

What do you see when you open yourself to observe the simple gifts of life?

Perhaps it is the way the sunlight streams through the trees, or the laughter of someone behind you on the trail, or the way the air smells of evergreens. Perhaps it is the way you and your hiking companion can walk in companionable silence, or the sound of a rushing creek next to the path, or the feeling of being a small speck in a giant universe full of possibilities.

Now open your eyes and really look around you. What do you see now? There are simple gifts everywhere, just waiting for you to notice them. Choose one right now and then express gratitude for it.

These gifts are not just for you; they are for everyone. Pay it forward by pointing out a simple gift today to someone else. In doing so, you can help them take a breath and really see life. The domino effect from this practice has the potential to have amazing, lasting effects that have the power to change lives for the better.

Life can be good and life can be heartbreaking. Yet through all the ups and downs, it is possible to stop, take a breath, and notice every simple gift life gives you.

“If you will stay close to nature, to its simplicity, to the small things hardly noticeable, those things can unexpectedly become great and immeasurable.” ―Rainer Maria Rilke

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

What Are You Doing to Embrace the Seasons of Life?

“Nature is never static. It is always changing. Everything is in a constant state of flux. Nothing endures. Everything is in the process of either coming into being or expiring.”
― Kilroy J. Oldster

As this year draws to a close, it provides an opportunity for reflection on where we have been on our journeys through life and where we would like to go from this point forward.

Within these quiet moments of reflection, we learn that every season of life holds its own magic, its own heartache, and its own joy. Just like the natural world around us, each season of life offers change, beauty, death, and rebirth. As the wheel of life spins around and around, it moves us into new seasons—even as we do our best to resist—ultimately forcing us to grow, adapt, and accept the realities associated with change. The good news is that each of these seasons brings us gifts, lessons, and experiences that we can carry forward into the future to transform ourselves into better parents, employees, leaders, friends, siblings, or mentors.

When we step away from the busyness of life to think, we realize we are all explorers on a quest for answers as long as we remain here. In Little Gidding, a poem by T. S. Eliot, he teaches us that “We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started, and know the place for the first time.” When viewing ourselves as explorers, we invite ourselves to stop resisting and instead ride the waves of change throughout each season of life while expressing gratitude for the past and the wisdom we have gained from both our failures and successes.

No season is easy. Each holds its unique challenges and joys. During one season, we may grieve the loss of someone we loved more than we ever imagined possible. During an alternative season, we may find our soul mate and begin a new life together. Within another season, we may land a dream job that propels us onto a new and exciting career path or pack up our belongings and start again in a different city or country. Another season may bring the gift of a new addition to the family, a dream vacation, or the opportunity to give back or pay it forward. No matter what experiences accompany each season, we will learn, love, and find a way to press on.

Every season in the cycle of life provides us with the chance to follow our hearts, align our goals with our purpose, and rediscover who we really are deep inside (not who others want us to be). As the leaves drop off the trees and the geese fly south, snow covers the ground, the birds begin singing again, and beautiful flowers dot the landscape, we all transform as we endure heartache, laugh heartily, love fiercely, bravely overcome our fears, and take plunges into the unknown.

As this holiday season draws to a close, I hope that you will embrace this time and practice gratitude for the gifts, blessings, and wisdom you will now take with you as you move forward into the next season.

Be well, be happy, and most importantly, be you.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.