Is the Endless Search for Purpose Easier than You Think?

Searching for our purpose in life can seem like an overwhelming task that requires constant thought and life-changing decisions. Sometimes the daunting question, “What is my purpose?” can send us on a decades-long quest for the answer, to no avail.   

Left seemingly without hope, we trudge back into our comfort zones where we mistakenly consider ourselves noncontributors to the world. To really make ourselves miserable, we then take a tour through hundreds of lives on social media and lament that everyone else is living their dream but you. Sound familiar? 

What if switching your mindset is all you need to put this endless search to rest? 

It’s as simple as this: we are all here to make the world a better place, one day at a time. Rather than searching for a larger purpose for decades, why not pursue your universal purpose every day? Viewing purpose with this simpler approach allows you to take the pressure off yourself to find an immediate answer and instead focuses on creating an empowering path forward where you take control to realize a life of courage, service, and consistent personal growth. 

 What are you going to do today to help fulfill your purpose

of making the world a better place? 

Here are a few ideas to get you started: 

Plant a garden. 

Help a friend. 

Make a pot of soup to share with a neighbor.  

Smile at a stranger. 

Write a poem. 

Feed the birds in your backyard. 

Read a good book and then gift it to a local assisted living facility. 

Encourage someone who needs a boost. 

Volunteer at a homeless shelter. 

Rescue an animal. 

Pick up trash while on a walk. 

Remember, no one is going to fulfill each of these tasks exactly the way you do. Although your purpose may be universal, your perspective and approach are unique. There is no one else exactly like you. 

When you relax, refocus, and revamp the way you look at life and your overall purpose, you will no longer have the time or inclination to compare your path to that of others. 

Every day that you inch your way outside your comfort zone by doing something to make the world a better place, you are fulfilling your universal purpose and becoming a better person in the process.  

It’s just that easy. 

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com. 

Living Her Passion – Dorothy Mielke

Dot Mielke hard at work sewing another mask.

Although Dorothy (Dot) Mielke has never experienced a pandemic like COVID-19, she did live through the scourge of the polio epidemic. Just before her second birthday in 1942, Dot, along with her three sisters, contracted polio. “While we were quarantined in the house, my dad was harvesting wheat in South Dakota,” said Dot. “They got word to him, but he couldn’t come home because he wasn’t allowed in the house.” Her mother was helped daily by a nurse and people in the community gifted the children with many toys. When the fever finally broke, all of Dot’s toys had to be burned except for one doll her mother set aside for her. Until the early 1950s when a polio vaccine was finally developed, Dot remembers not being able to congregate or swim in public pools, and the general anxiety surrounding the fears of contracting the virus. Unfortunately, the virus left Dot unable to walk without assistance again. Still, that did not stop her from living a full life, thanks to the mentorship and guidance from her father and greatest advocate. In a time when many people with disabilities were institutionalized, her father made her crutches and a ramp with rails so she could practice walking on her own—all while encouraging her to believe in her ability to persevere.

While growing up in Hastings, Nebraska, Dot learned to sew from her mother. “In that day and age if you knew how to sew, it saved money,” Dot added. The first thing she sewed with pride was a gathered skirt, a fashionable item in that era. After Dot matured into young adulthood, she learned to view herself without a disability, married, sewed clothes for her children, and eventually earned a degree in Special Education. When her battles with post-polio and carpal tunnel syndromes forced her to retire after nineteen years as a secondary special education teacher in the Omaha Public School system, Dot began sewing clothes and costumes for her grandchildren, and creating beautiful dance costumes for youth in the Omaha community. She hadn’t sewn for the past three years—until a new pandemic emerged on the horizon.

Just before Easter, a now seventy-nine-year-old Dot retrieved her sewing machine from storage and began creating masks. “I thought that since I had all this leftover material from sewing Halloween and dance costumes years ago, I might as well utilize it for good and sew masks for my family members,” she stated. Dot then conducted extensive research online on pattern development, filter options, and sewing supply availability and eventually decided that a triple layer of washable fabric, with an included pocket to insert a Scott’s shop rag, would provide the most protection. Her biggest challenge since then has been sourcing elastic and shop rags. Once her granddaughter, Gabby, began delivering the masks to family and sharing photos of the masks on social media, the positive responses were plentiful.

Dot utilizes many colorful fabrics for the masks she creates.

As Dot started feeling good about herself and her new purpose, she used her stimulus check to purchase more elastic, shop rags, and new cotton fabric she thought would bring a smile to people’s faces—even if they couldn’t be seen behind their masks. It makes her smile when she receives grateful messages and gifts from the recipients of her masks. “It’s the little things that mean so much more than money,” she added. Making the masks has rejuvenated Dot. Although her hands are numb on most days, Dot has sewn over 150 masks to date. She encourages her recipients to wash her masks between each use, so they stay sanitary and offer the best protection all around.

Today, she finds herself busier than ever, serving a new purpose that fills a need in her community. Her new mantra is, “Saving the world, one face at a time.” Dot takes special orders for masks every week, and continues to sew masks for adults and children, even when orders are low, knowing that soon school will be back in session and events will be re-scheduled. When asked what advice she would offer someone struggling with a disability, Dot encourages others to, “Just be you. I ask people to try to see me as I see me, not with a disability but just as Dot.” Although she is quite content with her life, Dot admitted that just for one day, she would like to stand on her tiptoes and be like one of the young dancers she once sewed costumes for.

Completed masks ready for her many recipients.

When reflecting on the pandemic and ways to cope, Dot urges people to use common sense, listen to advice from medical professionals, and not to believe everything they hear and read. Her own tactics include avoiding the news, binging on good television shows, and doing things that make her happy. As her life comes full circle and Dot is provided an opportunity to reassure all of us that this too shall pass, just like the polio epidemic, she gently reminds us of the importance of always being good stewards for others, no matter what the circumstances or challenges.

To place an order for a mask or masks, reach out to Dot at dotmasks@gmail.com.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

LIVING HER PASSION – Elissa Vilter, EV Floral and Design and Om Nom Nom Bakery

Elissa (on left) and Julie Ricceri, Owner of Diana’s Papillion Tea Shop

While growing up as the youngest of six children in Southern California, Elissa Vilter watched her mother whip up simple, elegant dishes while teaching her children that a meal is more than just a recipe. Instead, it is an opportunity to create a colorful presentation and table setting. Her family became accustomed to linens, candles, silverware, and a centerpiece of some kind on their table every night. When Elissa was eight, her mother signed her up for a summer school cooking class. “It was so much fun!” states Elissa. “I still remember taking what I learned to make a taco salad and decorating our table in a Mexican motif.” By the time Elissa was twelve, her mother was encouraging her to meal plan and recipe hunt. With her mother’s guidance that fresh was best, Elissa planned weekly menus, shopped for the ingredients, and prepared the meals. But the guidance from her mother didn’t stop there. Elissa’s mother also created decorated wedding and birthday cakes, sugared Easter eggs, and corsages and boutonnieres from flowers in her garden.

When Elissa was fifteen, her father left, forcing her mother to develop a catering business out of necessity. As she began catering and baking for weddings and other events, Elissa often accompanied her to help arrange flowers and decorate the space without any idea that she was already building a foundation of skills that would one day allow her to open her own business.

After her life journey led Elissa to eventually obtain a degree in Behavior Science from Loretto Heights College in Denver, Colorado, she married her husband, Scott, and began teaching. As his military career led them all over the world and finally to Nebraska, Elissa focused on raising their three children. But everything changed five years ago when Elissa created floral arrangements and baked cupcakes for a friend’s wedding. After that friend encouraged her to not only open a floral design business but also an in-home bakery, Elissa founded EV Floral and Design in 2015 and Om Nom Nom bakery in 2019.

An Elissa Vilter wedding reception centerpiece.

Elissa, whose business is generated by word-of-mouth only, contracts for about twelve weddings annually, creates flowers for proms, homecomings, and for seniors involved in athletics at a local high school; and produces floral arrangements and baked goods for ten to twelve additional events a year. Because her work comes in waves, Elissa doesn’t have typical days. “When I have an event coming up, my life gets crazy busy. When I’m not planning for a specific event, I’m answering emails, scheduling meetings with potential clients, ordering materials, and planning designs.” After visiting Diana’s Papillion Tea Shop in 2019 and asking if she could create baked goods for an upcoming event, a new relationship was formed. Today, Elissa handles all baking for the tea shop’s events and enjoys a wonderful friendship with the owner.

Elissa’s delicious baked goods at a recent tea party event.

While the COVID-19 pandemic has affected her business in the short-term, Elissa is excited about the future of her businesses. “I learned long ago that this is a process and to have patience,” she adds. While pursuing her passion, Elissa has found great joy in meeting new people. “This life is all about relationships,” she says, “The people I have met have shared such amazing stories about their lives.”

A bridal bouquet designed by Elissa.

Today, Elissa describes her life as content. Her support group is her family and closest friends. Her husband, also known as her official taste tester, loves it when she is baking and creating. Both of her sons have helped in delivering her arrangements to weddings, and her daughter has also helped in deliveries and setting up weddings and other events.

This passionate entrepreneur advises anyone who wants to pursue a dream to go for it and allow others to help. “It’s never too late unless you never do it,” she states.

Everyone who takes a bite of her delectable baked goods and views her beautiful floral arrangements has to be thrilled that Elissa blended all her skills and talents honed since childhood and pursued her passion for creative design and, most importantly, for making people happy.

For more about Elissa and her products, feel free to call her at (402) 541-3084.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Living His Passion – Nic Bianchi, Bianchi Candle Company

Nic Bianchi, Bianchi Candle Company, with a few of his products.

When most fourth graders were mastering multiplication and division problems, Nic Bianchi was busy designing a logo for his future business. After creating leather and wood products in an effort to satisfy his hunger for all things entrepreneurial, Nic moved into fifth grade where he developed a catalog, hired two sales reps, and began selling used Oriental Trading toys at recess. “I knew I wanted to do something big,” Nic says. But everything changed in 2014 when he received a candle making kit for his twelfth birthday. Nic, who was now a sixth grader, began making candles with his father that night. A self-professed lover of science and math, Nic was immediately hooked on the process of creating the best, all natural soy candle in the industry. A short time later, Bianchi Candle Company was officially in business.

Boosted by advice from his sixth-grade teacher who told him that no matter how bad things might become in life to always hold his head high, Nic sold his first candles in a local boutique in 2014 and created an LLC. By 2017, he had increased his presence in the marketplace and launched a fundraising division. In 2019, Nic auditioned for the popular television show, Shark Tank, launched his products in Hy-Vee, and went live on Amazon.

Today, Nic has a commercial space and team of four who help him create a line of products that include the Wild Worksmen, the first candle he developed at age twelve, the Yes You Can candle designed to inspire others to have a “yes you can” mindset, and the Original Bianchi Candle (Bianchi means white in Italian) that is focused on home décor. Candles are poured in batches of six or seven and take typically 24 hours to cool and set. His wide array of scents include chai tea, lavender lime, sandalwood, sweet orange chile pepper, fresh brewed coffee, spring rain, and a variety of emotions such as joy, hope, and kindness that gently remind us that life is a gift not to be taken for granted.

Nic with his products.

Nic, who is a typical high school junior who loves hanging with his friends at the lake, attends class until 12:30 every weekday and then heads to either his commercial space to develop new ideas and make candles or to meetings where it doesn’t take him long to convince vendors that a seventeen-year-old has what it takes to run a successful business. Along the way, Nic says the biggest lesson he’s learned is that no matter what is thrown his way, he can always persevere. His future plans include majoring in some form of business in college, perhaps in San Diego.

As every business owner knows, learning is part of daily life. A year ago, Nic didn’t know how to manage a landlord relationship that includes rent, utilities, and a host of other unknown challenges. “I’ve discovered running a business takes a lot of hard work, but I love it when big things happen because of our hard work and focus,” he adds. When asked what one word best describes his life today, Nic answered, “Fulfilled.

Bianchi Candle Company

Nic advises anyone who wants to pursue their passion in life to “go for it, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” Surrounded by an incredible support group that includes his parents, friends, and other entrepreneurs who mentor him, Nic has already discovered that owning a business offers wonderful rewards that include valuable life lessons that he can carry forward into the bright future that awaits him.

Jeff Bezos, Chairman and CEO of Amazon, once said, “You don’t choose your passions; your passions choose you.” Nic is an example of what one young man can do when he embraces his passion, walks through his fears, and creates a company that, in its own way, makes the world a better place.

For more about Bianchi Candle Company or to order products, click here: https://bianchicandleco.com.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com. 

Living Her Passion - Meg Frideres

Meg Frideres teaching mindfulness to Pre-K students and members of the Nevada High School varsity basketball team.

Meg Frideres, a natural-born helper, was influenced in her career choice by two people. The first was a high school teacher who was quite nice, but not effective in his work. The second, was her grandmother, Lillian, an educator and lifelong learner who climbed the pyramids of Egypt at age seventy-five. While on a journey to decide what profession to pursue, Meg’s first choice was not teaching. First, she pursued international relations, followed by a short stint taking pre-med courses, and finally to become an educator. “I loved the cultural aspects of international relations and wanted to make the world a better place,” she explained. “Being a doctor would have allowed me to care for others, but the pre-med curriculum was just not for me. Teaching allowed me to bring both of my loves together.”

To date, Meg has been teaching for twenty-seven years. But her initial path to teaching was lined with more obstacles than she originally imagined. After graduating from the University of Iowa, Meg soon discovered there were no social studies teaching positions open. As a result, she stepped into a role as Religious Education Director and Youth Minister for grades 6-12 at St. Thomas More in Iowa City. When she and her husband, Mark, moved to Davenport, Iowa, so he could attend Palmer College of Chiropractic, she eventually landed a position as a religious teacher and campus minister at Assumption High School. When Mark graduated, they moved to Nevada, Iowa, where he opened his chiropractic practice and she became a social studies teacher at Nevada High School.

Meg soon realized that teaching is all about building relationships, and quickly grew to love the fact that she was able to travel with teenagers, even for just a short time, on their life journeys. “It’s amazing to hear their stories and help young people realize more of their potential,” she added. “While I think content is important, I also believe it is secondary to modeling healthy relationships, being a good listener of the story, and believing in young people. They flourish if they have those things.”

Five years ago after Meg’s school district qualified for the Teacher Leadership Compensation Program, she was offered the opportunity to teach students part of the time, coach teachers in their professional development the rest of the time, and also travel around the district as a mindfulness coach. Although she was incorporating some mindfulness techniques into her daily classroom plans, Meg had no idea of its impact until a student shared that the mindfulness practice helped calm her nerves before a presentation. Meg said, “I knew I wanted to learn more, so the following year, I chose mindfulness in education as my focus in my professional development plan. I read a lot that summer and took my first course from Mindful Schools, a nonprofit that trains educators to revolutionize today’s learning environments. It just blossomed from there.”

Meg leading Nevada Public School system students in mindfulness exercises.

After offering a professional development session for teachers in her district, Meg was invited into different classrooms to help students practice mindfulness. She currently works with students from Early Kindergarten through 12th grade, and also coaches mindfulness to three of the high school sports teams. In elementary classrooms, she conducts an eight-week program that includes visits once a week for 20 minutes. She teaches mindfulness practices (called superpowers) that teachers practice with the students. She teaches students how to mindfully sit, listen, and breathe, and then moves on to using mindful movements to deal with emotions, set daily intentions, and perform acts of kindness and gratitude. At the middle school and high school levels, her visits are more specific to dealing with issues like stage fright or helping focus attention while writing papers.

Inspired by her faith and supported by her husband, Meg has decided to pursue a national certification through Mindful Schools and will begin classes in August 2020. Meg stated, “I hope to work with as many teachers, students, and coaches as possible because mindfulness empowers people to enjoy the moment, think positive, and let go of self-judgment. Mindfulness allows us to be happier and healthier people.”

Raising children in today’s chaotic world can often be challenging. Meg advises parents to unconditionally love their children, instill boundaries, listen more than you talk, apologize when you are wrong, and let them know you are in their corner. She also offers sage advice to those who want to pursue their passion in life. “Don’t kid yourself. It can be scary and sometimes you second-guess yourself, but nothing beats the feeling of realizing your potential and how you can positively impact people. I was not born a risk taker, but I have learned that some things are worth the risk.”

Meg added that her students remind her all the time how blessed she is to be a part of their lives. “There are no words to explain the significance of being able to walk beside them for part of their life journey.”

Perhaps her students would agree that they are the ones who are blessed as they learn valuable mindfulness techniques from her that will help them gracefully face challenges, obstacles, and fears for the rest of their lives.

For more about Mindful Schools and their programs, visit https://www.mindfulschools.org/. To contact Meg directly with questions about mindfulness practices in the classroom, email her at: mfrideres@nevadacubs.org.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Living His Passion – Brandon McDermott

Brandon McDermott at work at NET radio.

Brandon McDermott was born into less than ideal circumstances. His father was a drug addict who not only viciously beat his mother (who was also addicted to drugs), but also his children. In 1999, his father was sent to prison for killing his girlfriend in front of Brandon. As a result, Brandon moved in and out of foster care from age seven to fourteen while attending six elementary schools and four middle schools. Despite his struggles at home, Brandon discovered that radio was his calling while working at a career center during his sophomore year of high school. “I loved connecting with people,” he added.

After high school graduation, Brandon fell through the cracks. Because his parents were unable to fill out the necessary forms so he could attend college, Brandon secured a job at a local company where he worked his way up for the next seven years from entering data to managing his entire department. But everything changed in 2011 when Brandon decided to accept a position as an intern at KVNO radio in Omaha. He worked for free. “I had to prove myself and demonstrate that I had potential,” he stated. “There were many people along the way who told me I needed a college degree to attain a job in media. I proved them wrong.” Brandon did begin attending college eventually and is on track to graduate from the University of Nebraska Omaha in May 2020 with a bachelor’s degree in multidisciplinary studies.

Brandon noted his time at KVNO was a terrific learning experience that proved to be very rewarding. He learned from the best in the business including longtime Omaha radio legend Otis XII who offered suggestions on how to attain success in the radio industry, encouraged him to ask questions to learn, and gently reminded him to enjoy the ride. While at KVNO, Brandon won several awards. His favorites were his first Omaha Press Club “Best in Class” award for his 2014 interview with Marlin Briscoe, a star athlete at South High and UNO who became the first starting African American NFL quarterback in history, and another award from the Midwest Broadcast Journalists Association for his 2016 story on the North Omaha reinvestment project.

Today, Brandon is happily married and working as a morning show host and reporter at NET radio where he still enjoys connecting with people. His days start early. He wakes up at three o’clock in the morning and is at work by four to host the Morning Edition show from five to nine o’clock. The rest of his workday consists of reporting duties.

Brandon advises anyone who wants to pursue their calling in life to create small and large goals. “I started college in 2014. It has been a slow process, but it started with one step. Now I’m within sight of walking across the stage to accept my diploma. To me, nothing is more fulfilling than achieving a goal I’ve set. I set a goal to make the Dean’s list one semester and the Chancellor’s list another semester. I’ve hit both. Confidence in yourself makes others confident in your abilities as well.”

When asked to identify one word that best describes his life today, Brandon said, “Growing. I have learned to trust myself as a host. I’ve found my voice when on the air. It’s a good feeling to have.” In pursuing his passion despite his challenges, he has gained a sense of belonging and meaning in his life. “I have never felt like my job is work,” he added. “Every choice and experience brought me to where I am. I wouldn’t be the man I am without my childhood or my first job. I could have used all that happened to me to curl up and yell at the world, but I used it to overcome and become what I am today. We are shaped in life by what happens to us, but we are judged in life by what we do with it.”

Brandon McDermott is an inspiring example of what it means to persevere through seemingly insurmountable obstacles to not only find a calling, but also summon the courage to pursue it. In doing so, he has become an example of the beautiful transformation that can occur when one decides to live with determination, not bitterness.

To listen live to Brandon every weekday morning from 5:00 – 9:00 a.m., click here: http://netnebraska.org/radio-stream. To read his memoir, Abandon Brandon, visit Amazon.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Living Her Passion - Ashley Spitsnogle

Ashley Spitsnogle painting “live” at the 2018 Heartfelt Gala in Nebraska.

While growing up in a small farming community in Odell, Nebraska, Ashley Spitsnogle loved drawing horses and mermaids. After her life’s journey led her to attend and then graduate from Doane University in Crete, Ashley studied at Studio Arts College International in Florence, Italy, for a month where she focused on painting and drawing. When returning to the States, Ashley decided she wanted to do whatever it took to become a professional artist.

Her first professional project was illustrating the children’s book, Josh the Baby Otter, for the Joshua Collingsworth Memorial Foundation whose mission is to create awareness about water safety. Since then, she has traveled throughout the nation on behalf of the Foundation, partnering with numerous organizations including Rotary International and the Michael Phelps Foundation to prevent drowning accidents. Today, Ashley stay very busy commissioning diverse art for clients that includes Husker prints, abstract pieces, and paintings of cattle, horses, and landscapes. Additionally, she hosts art shows and paints live at events that include the Cattleman’s Ball of Nebraska, Teammates Mentoring, the Lied Center, Heartfelt Ball, Nebraska Bar Association, Farm Credit Services of America, and many others.

When creating her art, Ashley often develops a composition in Photoshop first, so she can gather an idea of how it will look on canvas in different ways. After her process leads her to utilizing charcoal on the canvas to lay out the shapes for the painting, Ashley then layers in blocks of color and adds the details as the final step. In order to demonstrate her process, Ashley has produced numerous, fascinating time-lapse videos that detail the beginning to end stages of a painting. She adds, “Painting live is like a performance. As long as I am overly prepared, I become hyper-focused and just start painting. Generally, I give myself four hours to complete a painting on a three-foot by four-foot canvas, so it’s large enough for people to see from a distance.”

Ashley, who has always been a big Husker fan, became licensed through the University of Nebraska to commission her artwork three years ago after she painted a Brook Berringer and Tom Osborne painting live at a Teammates mentoring event. After Coach Osborne signed the painting, she posted it on Facebook, prompting many to reach out including Brook’s family and friends. The following year, Ashley painted “Last Tunnel Walk” live at a Heartfelt Incorporated event for families who have lost children. The painting, approved beforehand by both Sam Foltz’s and Brook Berringer’s families, shows Brook and Sam walking into the light with Brook’s hand on Sam’s shoulder, as if to lead and comfort him. After the painting was auctioned off, Sharon Dickinson (the president of Heartfelt Incorporated), Jill and Gerald Foltz, and Ashley and her family delivered two prints to Bill Moos and Matt Davison at the University. Today, the prints hang in Memorial Stadium. Ashley adds, “I am honored the painting has touched people, as both guys are still making a lasting influence and impression on others.” Additionally, her painting of Coach Scott Frost made the cover of the Husker Sports Fall Guide, of which over 60,000 copies were distributed. Recently, Big Red Wrap Up and other news stations have featured stories on her Husker art.

Ashley’s artistic portrayal of Brook Berringer and Sam Foltz

The best piece of advice Ashley received when she decided to become a professional artist was to never give up and undervalue herself. She loves having a work space in Main Street Studios and Art Gallery in Omaha, among other artists who inspire her daily. When she is not painting approximately four to five hours daily, she works on a regular basis with the Joshua Collingsworth Memorial Foundation, illustrating and helping with the publication of magazines and brochures. Her art is currently displayed in Lincoln at Venue Restaurant & Lounge, Scheels, Main Street Studios and Art Gallery, Husker Hounds, and Revitalift in Lincoln.

“Nebraska Strong”, painted by Ashley at the Cattleman’s Ball to portray the hay being brought to farmers after the historic floods of 2019.

Ashley has gained much from pursuing her passion. “I am excited to wake up each day and get to work,” she says. “I also have the freedom to travel and enjoy the fact that no two days are alike.” For anyone who wants to pursue their own passion in life, Ashley advises, “When you don’t dread going to work every day, it is worth every sleepless night and stress. I don’t know what kind of person I would be if I didn’t pursue my passion. You only live once, so you might as well enjoy what you do.”

Edgar Degas once said, “Art is not what you see, but what you make others see.” Every time Ashley stands in front of a canvas and begins another creation, she helps all of us see the beauty in our beloved football team, the Nebraska landscape, and life itself.

To read more about Ashley or to purchase one of her pieces, visit ashleyspitsnogle.com.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Living His Passion – Dave Greulich (also known as Santa)

The itch to play Santa is in Dave Greulich’s blood. His chef father played Santa, visiting three families every Christmas for thirty years. Still, Dave didn’t have an interest in transforming into Santa as he began a diverse career that included working as a restaurant consultant, running a BBQ restaurant, and working in Racing Chemistry (testing greyhounds and horses that raced at pari-mutuel tracks) at Iowa State University. But sixteen years ago when Dave was in his early fifties, after a family member suggested that he put his home-grown beard to good use, Dave decided to apply for a Santa job at the local mall. On his first day, Dave didn’t make it from the parking lot to inside the mall before he heard a tiny voice crying, “Santa! Santa!” After turning around, he noticed a girl break away from her father. As he got down on one knee and opened his arms, she ran full speed toward him and melted into his arms. Dave says he knew right then that he would be playing Santa for as long as he was able. “That feeling was unlike anything I can accurately explain,” he adds.

After attending Santa School, Dave first worked in the local mall, and then traveled to Torrance, California, Omaha, Nebraska, Orlando, Florida, and then Redmond, Washington, before finally settling into the title he now holds as Santa Ames. Dave says the best piece of advice he received when he decided to play Santa is that he must believe in himself. “Every Santa knows not to get too wrapped up in themselves or the character,” he states. “After all, I am not Santa. I am a helper; a Santa performer.”

There are many qualities that make up a good Santa. “He must love children and enjoy talking and listening to them,” Dave adds. “He must be real, kind and gentle, humble, smart, and quick with answers.” The children that sit on his lap often bring both amusing and heartbreaking stories with them. One little girl wanted a real Harry Potter wand so she secretly could turn her mother into a pig. Another girl asked for make-up for Christmas. When Dave asked her why, she stated that everyone had told her she was ugly and that she felt make-up would make her more beautiful. Dave said that after he buoyed her spirits and told her she was naturally beautiful, she hugged him tightly and skipped away. It is experiences like that one that remind Dave every day that both children and adults look up to him and that it’s important not to betray that trust.

Photo by Jenn Hoffman Photography

Dave says that Santa imparts many valuable lessons to all ages that include, “Be kind to one another, don’t take things so seriously, it’s better to give than to receive, and it takes so little to make a difference.” No one is too old to visit Santa. Many times, college students stop by and tell Dave it’s a tradition that they have a photo taken with Santa and give it as a gift to their mother. Another time, a couple—ages 102 and 96—brought a group of at least twenty-five family members to witness their visit with him.

Every holiday season, Dave decorates his yard with lights and at least fifteen inflatables, a sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer. A few nights each season, Dave sits in the sleigh and invites everyone to his yard to have their photo taken with him. In return, he asks for a donation for the local food bank. Last year, he donated nearly one thousand pounds of food and several hundred dollars.

This time of year, Santa is very busy. In October, he begins contacting clients in the Des Moines/Ames, Iowa, area, ensures his background checks are completed, his liability insurance is renewed, his suits are clean, and that he has a fresh supply of candy canes on hand. When he is not preparing for a chaotic holiday season, Dave cares for his beloved wife who has ALS.

He advises anyone who wants to pursue their passion in life to “Go for it. Don’t be afraid of setbacks or to ask for advice, help, or for a mentor. Remember, you don’t know everything. No matter how much you have learned over the years or how many years you have done it, there is always someone who knows more and can help you somehow.”

Charles W. Howard once said, “Santa Claus does not enter through the chimney. He enters through the heart.” Every Christmas when Dave dons his red suit, black belt, and boots and gives a hearty “Ho! Ho! Ho!” to girls and boys of all ages, he does just that, helping all of us believe in the miracle of giving.

To book Santa for a future event, visit http://santaames.com/.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Living His Passion - Brad Dickson

Brad Dickson, Comedy Writer

Brad Dickson’s parents would have preferred that he do pretty much anything other than become a comedy writer. But instead, twenty-two-year-old Brad shunned his original dream of heading to law school, packed his common sense and knowledge gained from earning a degree in history from the University of Nebraska at Lincoln, and headed for Los Angeles to pursue his dream of performing stand-up.

A year later after performing his original material in Hollywood at the Comedy Store, Brad gave new meaning to the phrase “starving writer” and returned home to Omaha. Not discouraged despite well-meaning Omahans who advised him not to pursue a career writing jokes, Brad worked in telemarketing and sent jokes to Joan Rivers, who to his shock and awe, decided to buy a few. Later, Brad wrote for Rodney Dangerfield and other comedians who paid him $10 to $50 dollars per joke. While Brad kept himself busy writing screenplays that garnered little interest, Jay Leno began hosting for Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show on Monday nights. After Brad sent a few jokes to Jay in care of NBC in Burbank, he called Brad to give him his fax number. “I was officially earning a living writing for the first time,” Brad says. “I think I was 29.” A couple of weeks after the Leno call, Brad received a call from an agent who eventually sold his screenplay, “Honeymoon” to Universal Studios. “I am reasonably certain I was the only guy living in Maple Village with a movie deal,” jokes Brad. After seven years of struggle, Brad’s career turned around over the course of a few weeks.

As his life’s journey led him back to Los Angeles for seventeen years, Brad became one of about a dozen writers at The Tonight Show who scanned the news and then cranked out 100+ jokes a day until the show’s taping at 5:00 p.m. Back then, the show garnered approximately six million viewers each night.

Because of his role at The Tonight Show, Brad was lucky enough to see and/or meet nearly every celebrity that appeared on the show, including his favorite comedian, Steve Martin. Brad, who feels very lucky he was able to land a gig in late-night television, compares joke-writing to the Haiku-poetry writing process. “Both are equally challenging,” he jests. Later, Brad would land a columnist gig with the Omaha World-Herald, whose editors found him based on several columns he wrote for The Los Angeles Times. While at the World-Herald, Brad states the most famous person he ever saw was Tom Shatel, who he says is no Robert De Niro. His column at the newspaper involved writing topical material about the news of the day, but from a local perspective. His favorite columns to write were his humorous Q&As with political candidates. Somewhere in between all the jokes and columns, Brad co-write two books with Martha Bolton titled, Maybe Life’s Just Not That Into You (a parody of self-help books) and Race You to the Fountain of Youth (a parody of all the crazy things people do to stay young).

Today Brad is actively blogging at braddicksononline.com where he writes about both humorous and serious topics. The Huskers, their fans, and coach are some of his favorite subjects (he’d love to interview Scott Frost, who is rumored to have a great sense of humor). He has also blogged about playing one last round of golf with his father when he knew he was dying, and a scathing column about Omaha’s snow removal plan, which seems to basically amount to waiting for spring. Brad is also dabbling with writing theatrical plays and is mulling the idea of writing another book. His girlfriend, Michele, reads and enjoys everything he writes—or so she says.

Brad’s favorite part of writing humor is churning out funny-yet-critical material about sanctimonious political figures. Now that he’s no longer working in an office, Brad says he’s looking forward to finally getting the neck tattoo he’s always wanted. He states that today, people are nicer to him than when he lived in his parents’ basement and hitchhiked around Omaha during the pre-serial killer age. “Having a creative outlet has given me a measure of contentment,” he adds. The biggest lesson he has learned in pursuing his passion is persistence pays off.

He advises those desiring to pursue their passion in life to not listen to the so-called experts when they reject you. “There are many, many people in positions of power—supervisors, producers, coaches, and bosses—who don’t know what they are doing. Make sure you’re pursuing something you’re very good at and then ignore the naysayers,” Brad says.

To read Brad’s popular blog (or, if you’re Scott Frost, to inquire about an interview), visit braddicksononline.com.

“I did it again today—I honked at a Student Driver car for absolutely no reason.

My new hobby is really warped.”

—Brad Dickson

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

When It’s Time to Reevaluate Your Inner Circle

Who is in Your Inner Circle?

Although we do our best every day to surround ourselves with a great group of supporters, sometimes events or situations occur that can prompt disappointment or frustration with those in our inner circle. When these feelings become consistent and hard to ignore, it is most likely a good time to reevaluate the relationship and what you are receiving from it. While none of us are perfect, sometimes there are red flags that we may choose to ignore out of fear of being alone, a belief that a person will change to please us, or the hope that one day, the person will make as much time for us as we make for them.

So, what are some powerful questions to ask yourself while reflecting on your current relationships?

1.     Am I getting what I want and/or need from this friendship/relationship on a regular basis?

2.     Is this person an energy zapper or an energy producer?

3.     Does this person have my back?

4.     Is this person honest with me?

5.     Does this relationship offer a safe place for me to be myself and for the other person to do the same?

6.     Do I feel better about myself after spending time with this person?

7.     Do I feel accepted for who I am, even when I’m having a bad day?

8.     Do our conversations feel natural, and do I feel heard in all situations and at all times without judgment?

9.     Can I trust this person with my secrets and to not talk behind my back?

10.  Does this person treat me with kindness and respect in all situations?

If, while asking yourself these important questions, you realize that the relationship is not as meaningful as you would like, it’s always a good idea to compassionately communicate your concerns to the other party and give them a chance to respond and address the issues before making any decisions. In the end, it is up to us to protect ourselves from unhealthy or toxic relationships and surround ourselves with a good support system that boosts us to confidently move forward in life knowing we are unconditionally loved and accepted.

No matter how hard we try to avoid ending relationships that don’t work for us anymore, it is always a good idea to step back, ponder all interactions, and then if necessary, accept that if it is time to move in a different and separate direction, it will be a good decision for you. After all, it is not until we walk away from relationships that do not serve us anymore that we can become open to receiving new relationships that do.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.