How to Persevere through Change and Obstacles

While participating in a school track meet, a ten-year-old boy accidentally ran right out of one of his sneakers. In a split second, he made a choice that would dictate how he would navigate through his life from that point forward. Instead of stopping to pick it up or put it back on, he quickly adjusted his mindset, left the shoe behind, kept running, and beat all his competitors to win the race. A few years later, that same boy went on to secure two gold medals in the Olympics.

“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races, one after the other.”

–Walter Elliott

Perseverance is critical to achieving our goals, navigating through change, and enduring unforeseen challenges. Even though we all understand the importance of perseverance to help us stay focused while on a journey through change or to find contentment or success in life, our inner-critic often attempts to override our best intentions to keep at it by telling us, “You can’t do this,” or “You’re not good enough,” or “You will probably fail.” As a result, this fixed mindset ultimately holds us back from achieving our dreams, learning, and experiencing life in its fullest form. Although this fixed mindset can feel comfortable and safe, it most likely leaves us feeling stagnant, miserable, and hopeless. The good news is that a fixed mindset is a habit that can be changed.

“Perseverance is a choice. It’s not a simple, one-time choice; it’s a daily one …”

–Margaret J. Wheatley

In order to persevere through challenging times or even routine everyday experiences, it is possible to make decisions, even in seconds, that push us to continue on, if for no other reason than to see what’s around the next corner. By changing our internal dialogue from “You can’t do this,” to “You can try and see where this leads you,” we are making a conscious decision to alter our perspective to a growth mindset, a belief that encourages us to change the course of our lives through action.

“It always seems impossible until it’s done,”

–Nelson Mandela

The next time you are facing a seemingly insurmountable obstacle or a change that terrifies you, think about the story of the ten-year-old boy who made a split-second choice to persevere, readjust his mindset, and finish the race strong. 

By setting small action steps every day that move you forward, quiet your inner-critic, guide you around obstacles, and help you press through change, you too can persevere to achieve great things.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoac

When the Worst Case Scenario Turns Out to be the Best Case Scenario

Gohei Nishikawa first took up the piano when he was a teenager living in Osaka, Japan. After nurturing dreams of playing professionally, he eventually gave up his aspirations when he couldn’t seem to break into the competitive field. But one day while filling in for another pianist during a recital, Nishikawa was discovered as a promising new talent. Shortly after moving to New York to study under American pianist, David Bradshaw, Nishikawa performed his first solo concert without any idea of the challenges that would lie ahead for him in the next year.

A few months later, Nishikawa noticed his hands becoming unusually stiff and ultimately received devastating news. He had focal dystonia, a chronic condition that causes muscles to involuntarily tighten. With limited use of his hands, it seemed his dream of playing professionally had died once again. Nishikawa, desperate and depressed for relief, attempted suicide.

After eventually coming to accept his situation, Nishikawa found work in a preschool and attempted to move on with his life. But when he was asked by the principal to play a song for the children in the classroom, everything suddenly changed for Nishikawa when he sat down at the piano after a long absence and realized the children only loved the music, not how his hands looked or the way his fingers operated. It was then that he began creating his own way to play, despite his physical challenges. Eight years after his diagnosis, Nishikawa officially made his professional debut. In eight more years, he played in the main hall at Carnegie Hall.

Today, Nishikawa performs around the world, demonstrating to his audience that many things are possible with perseverance and ingenuity. He is grateful for his physical challenge because it has helped him appreciate the smallest gifts in life. The words he lives by every day are, “The worst case scenario can turn out to be the best case scenario.”

In this mindfulness practice, think about a time in your life when the worst case scenario may have led you to a best case scenario you could never have imagined in your wildest dreams. Perhaps you endured an agonizing breakup, only to find the love of your life a few months later. Maybe you lost your job, only to find a much better role at a growing company. Perhaps you received a disheartening health diagnosis, only to find a devoted new friend in a support group.

Now as you continue to reflect, ask yourself, “What did I learn during this time? How have I changed for the better because of that experience? What am I more grateful for now than I was before?” It is important to recognize these valuable lessons as gifts, just as Nishikawa did.

Gohei Nishikawa nearly gave up during his darkest days. He openly shares his story today with the hope that he is an inspiration to others enduring their own darkness. While letting his stiff fingers seemingly dance across the keys in front of global audiences, he transformed into a perfect example of what can happen when we believe in ourselves and our ability to persevere and implement creative solutions, even while enduring a worst case scenario. 

To listen to Gohei Nishikawa’s performance at the United Nation’s 70th anniversary concert in 2019, click here: https://youtu.be/Erxpc6Doins

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Is Grit the Secret to Success?

Pioneers relied on it while making the two-thousand-mile journey from Missouri to Oregon during the Great Emigration. Athletes have relied on it to finish marathons, break records, win the Super Bowl, participate in the Olympics, and accomplish more than they ever imagined on the field of play. Business executives have also been known to rely on it to carry a company and its employees through challenging economic times. And yes, even ordinary people rely on it to persevere through obstacles, attain professional success, and overcome fears.

IT is GRIT, and it is a necessary trait for anyone who wants to realize their best life.

Grit is defined by Merriam Webster’s dictionary as a firmness of mind or spirit and unyielding courage in the face of hardship or danger. When life presents challenges that initially seem too difficult to overcome, sometimes despite our best efforts, we may find it easier to go into the fetal position, close our eyes, and hope that someone wakes us when it is over. During these times, we may wonder if it is really possible to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and find the grit deep within to help us fight our greatest battles and somehow come out a better person in the end.

It is possible. In fact, the letters G, R, I, and T can be transformed into words that are easy to remember and that have the power to help carry us through the toughest of times:

Goals. People who rely on grit to persevere through life’s greatest challenges set goals on a regular basis. Not only do they set goals, they often have someone hold them accountable to achieving them. Their goals are clear, achievable, and broken down into realistic action steps that take them in new directions. Gritty people realize that goals push us out of our comfort zones and into the realm of possibilities. Most importantly, goals help us follow through with the promise we have made to ourselves to create our best life.

Resolve. When facing challenges, in life, pretend you are a rock climber standing before a giant boulder. You want more than anything to safely get to the top. So, how do you do it? Plan your route and then slowly make your way, one calculated move at a time. Be open to potential changes in your route. Focus on your destination while enjoying the journey. Be strong. Be proud of yourself every time you move forward.

Intuition. Our gut is a powerful companion in our lives. Unfortunately most of us never listen to it. Or if we hear it, we try to quiet the inner-voice by believing it is wrong. When creating a path forward, allow yourself time to reflect to discern whether your feelings are fear-based or whether you really have a bad feeling about your new direction. People who rely on grit to move through obstacles also trust their intuition to guide and protect them.

Tenacious. In today’s competitive world, persistence is key to success. Learn. Be open to new ideas. Be honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses. Do not be deterred from achieving your goals if they are realistically attainable. Revise your plan if need be. Wake up every morning, look at yourself in the mirror, and give yourself a pep talk. Gritty people know how to motivate themselves when no one else is doing it for them. Don’t give up.

Goals. Resolve. Intuition. Tenacious.

The next time you’re facing a challenge, remember it is GRIT that leads us straight over obstacles and into our best lives.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. If you’d like to set up a 15-minute discovery call to learn more about the coaching process, reach out today via the contact page at crossthebridgecoaching.com.

Who Inspires You Every Day?

Sometimes in life, the simplest everyday acts are what inspire us the most.

He has no idea he inspires me. The neighbor who lives four doors up the hill from me has special challenges. Every morning for the past twenty years, he has diligently laced his sneakers, bundled up if it’s freezing, and headed out his door for exercise. He is disciplined, determined, and reliable. No matter what the weather, he perseveres.

My office window faces the sidewalk. Sometimes I happen to look up while he’s on the last stretch of his outdoor exercise session. All these years, I have been stopping whatever I am doing and quietly observing him as he heads home. You see, our houses are situated on top of a giant hill—a hill that I have been trying to tackle at the end of my run for the last twenty years—and the same hill that he has conquered every day on his own without a coach, parent, or personal trainer to cheer him on.

His journey to the top of the hill is not easy every day. As the years have progressed, his gait has slowed to a slow and steady pace. Although he leans to one side now, he trudges up the hill with a quiet determination while keeping his focus on his goal of reaching the top of the hill, no matter what it takes. His daily struggle is mesmerizing and always prompts me to reflect on his perseverance despite his challenges and then determine a way I can utilize this inspiration to motivate myself to achieve what I want for my own life, not just that day but every day.

Inspiration is all around us. All we have to do is be aware. Inspiration comes from the child who is overjoyed after solving a math problem without help from the teacher. Inspiration comes from the mother who juggles complicated tasks at work and then comes home to simultaneously care for her aging parents and young children. Inspiration comes from Paralympic athletes who prove over and over again that great things can be achieved despite physical obstacles. Inspiration comes from a senior citizen who has found her purpose in serving others during her final act in life. Inspiration comes from the bus driver who makes a point of smiling at all his passengers as they enter his bus, the server who makes a special point of complimenting all her guests, the CEO who heads a fundraiser for an employee facing hard times, or the ordinary man who, without thinking, runs into a burning building to save those inside from certain death.

My neighbor will probably never know the influence he has had on how I view life. Since I first began observing him from my office window, we have both sprouted a few more gray hairs and learned new things, all while managing to keep ourselves upright and breathing. We have much more in common than not. Through it all, he has taught me that no matter what our challenges, we all have the power to look deep within for the strength to trudge up the hill to reach our goals and pursue the life we were meant to have.

Today, look for the inspiration. I promise it is there, all around you, just waiting to lead you in the right direction.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach who specializes in helping her clients both in Omaha and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.