You may have heard of the popular Zen tale about a horse and its rider. As the horse wildly gallops down a road with its rider tightly gripping the reins, both man and animal eventually meet a stranger standing beside the road who curiously shouts, “Where are you going?” The rider replies, “I don’t know. Ask the horse!”
Although this story is short, it contains a powerful and symbolic message about empowerment. Each of us, no matter what our struggles or challenges, has control over the direction of our lives. But how do we find that direction when all we feel is lost? First, ask yourself this question:
Who is holding the reins of my life?
If you believe you are the only one holding the reins of your life, terrific! You have realized the power you have within to take control of where you are going and how you want to get there by creating a concrete action plan, setting clear goals, and assigning someone to hold you accountable to getting from here to there.
If you believe that someone else (or several others) are holding the reins instead of you, now is not the time to worry or continue treading water. The first step in attaining life transformation is to recognize the need for positive change. Now, ask yourself this question:
What is one thing I can begin doing today to point myself in the right direction?
Perhaps you would like to become a healthier version of yourself. Beginning with that idea, think about how you can transform one less-than-ideal daily decision into a positive action that guides you toward a bigger goal. Pledge to go to bed one hour earlier every night so you can awaken sooner and exercise. Log everything you eat into a food journal. Prep meals to save time and avoid mindless snacking.
If you are unhappy at your job, think about how you can replace a robotic daily decision with a better one that leads you down a new path. Rather than complaining about events that are out of your control, update your resume. Set aside time once a week to apply for new opportunities. Talk to a recruiter. Network with your connections.
Every time you complete an action that moves you in the direction of a more content future, reward yourself with positive self-talk. Now, ask yourself this one final question:
How do I feel about myself and my direction when I take steps toward positive change?
When incorporating positive change in your life, you create a path forward that leads to contentment. Socrates once said, “The secret of change is to focus all your energy not on fighting the old, but in creating the new.” This is your life. Remember, you don’t have to be a helpless rider on a galloping horse. You have the strength. You have the courage. You have the power deep within to confidently take back the reins, make the changes you need to be content, and inspire others by walking the talk.
Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.
