Why Looking Back Helps You Look Forward

As a year ends and a new one awaits on the horizon, we are offered an exceptional opportunity to reflect on the past twelve months, identify what we have learned, and then carry forward those lessons to make the next year even better. One of the most valuable aspects of this practice is that it helps us remember that we are not expected to be perfect while we are here and that there are no failures—simply lessons.  

 “You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress simultaneously.” 

--Sophia Bush 

While taking time to remember what you have learned, it is optimal to document your identified lessons in writing followed by a positive action step, inspired by this lesson, you would like to take forward into the next year. This allows you to view your life from another angle. An example of a lesson might be: 

I’ve learned that it is important for me to be adventurous. To explore the world. To go to new places and find out how others live. To listen to their stories. To learn that we are all more alike than different. These experiences are what make me feel alive and part of something much bigger. 

Action Step for 2023: I will plan two trips that take me out of my comfort zone and allow me to gain new experiences and insights. 

 “Everyday life teaches us a new lesson without any classroom.” 

--Danish Khan 

Another example might be: 

I’ve learned to own my truth and individuality. In order to attain my best life, I will identify what I want for myself (not what others want for me), and then determinedly head down this path. I will not feel critical of myself for pursuing what makes me happy. 

Action Step for 2023: I will create a weekly list of goals to achieve that move me one step closer every day toward my ideal life. 

This end-of-the-year practice also encourages you to talk back to the inner critic who is constantly telling you that you must be perfect, that you must compete with others to be happy, and that your fears are bigger than your dreams. It also allows you to release other negative thoughts that are holding you back from moving forward with a positive outlook. Finally, this practice empowers you to remember that you are the one who controls your life and attitude. 

 “Why let go of yesterday? Because yesterday has already let go of you.” 

--Steve Maraboli 

Before 2022 ends, become the most curious person you know. It’s time to get to know yourself on an even deeper level by taking an honest, nonjudgmental look at the past year, and then using what you learn to create a clear plan going forward that brings you more fulfillment and encourages you to shine your unique light onto the world. 

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com. 

Mindfulness Practice: Looking Back on an Unforgettable Year

The year 2020 has garnered many descriptive phrases that include “unprecedented,” “apocalyptic,” and “tumultuous.” Although there has been much focus on what we disagree about in the world, one thing is certain: those of us who have survived the last twelve months will share a collective sigh of relief when we can once again move forward into the future with confidence, calmness, and clarity.

Through all of the struggles, chaos, and uncertainty surrounding this year, there is no question that we have all learned something in 2020. While we remained quarantined in our homes, perhaps some of us experienced true loneliness for the first time in our lives and have had to teach ourselves how to be okay with silence. Others may have seized the opportunity to clean, organize, and get things done that had remained on the back burner of their lives for longer than they would like to admit. Some may have decided to take control over their future and learn a new skill or start a side business. Others may have taken the opportunity to re-evaluate their career and where they want to go from here. A few more may have decided to help others by delivering food or groceries to those in need, contributing money to charities, or making regular phone calls to elderly relatives or friends.

No matter where you are in the process of learning more about yourself and how you are coping with one of the greatest challenges to affect the world to date, it is never too late to reflect on all you will take away from this moment in time and carry into the future to either help yourself or others around you. Right now, take a breather and ask yourself this question:

What is the greatest lesson I have learned in 2020?

 Once you have formulated an answer either in your mind or on paper, ask yourself this question:

 What will I take forward from this experience to effect positive change?

 As we enthusiastically welcome a new year, it is important for all of us to keep our eyes on the path in front of us that is full of opportunities, fresh lessons, and unique experiences. As Roy T. Bennett once said, “The past is a place of reference, not a place of residence; the past is a place of learning, not a place of living.”

For a few minutes, be here, right now, in this place of learning. And then let it go so you can grow, develop, and then carry your valuable lessons forward to help yourself and others in 2021.

Vicky DeCoster is a Certified Life Coach based in Omaha, Nebraska, who specializes in helping her clients both locally and nationwide to move past obstacles, create a plan for happiness, and cross the bridge of transition to find a new and fulfilling direction in life. To read more about her and her practice, visit her at crossthebridgecoaching.com.